I was waiting for a bus when I saw a crowd of secondary students walk to the same bus stop. I was annoyed because they're typically noisy, especially the boys. As I was queuing up to board the bus, I decided to go to the side instead because I thought that they'd probably take up all the seats on the bus. As it is, I was already irritated when they came.
One of them, a decent-looking boy, made a gentlemanly gesture with his hand to indicate I could go up first. Though I thanked him, what flashed through my mind was that he was probably doing it to impress his friends. After some time, I was calmer and realised it may have been really out of goodwill.
The point I am trying to make is this. I'm not middle-aged so he wasn't respecting his elders for sure. However neither do I look my age though I definitely look older than a secondary school girl, I reckon. He was just trying to be gentlemanly.
Well, it is not a bad thing to have such encounters but I wouldn't feel deprived should I not have them. I really don't think they are necessary to make me feel like a lady. I can feel like one in other ways like dressing and walking.
I'm not undermining guys who are naturally gentlemanly towards ladies, especially those who do it towards their partners as a caring gesture but I'd not be appreciative of those who put on a show just to create a good impression.
On the contrary, I abhor ladies who expect guys to be gentlemanly towards them and abuse the privilege. I mentioned in my blog that I saw a girl expressing her displeasure at her male friend for being late but perhaps he had a valid reason that she didn't bother to find out. Must all guys wait for their female companions when meeting them, even if they're late?! A relationship goes beyond these external things, I believe.
I saw a well-dressed woman at a hotel. She was looking at her male companion moving some things. I feel that even if she was wearing heels, a dress and carrying a bag (which she was), she could have still done something else to help set things up. After all, they were the organizers of the event.
I get annoyed when ladies think that their dressing and fragility allows them the opportunity to get off scot-free when doing work. I think it's unfair to guys to do all the work and I think they'd be thankful for some help!
That's why I had no qualms about helping a guy to carry chairs at a wedding reception, even though I was wearing a long dress, low heels and carrying a bag! He was doing it all on his own and though I must have looked foolish, I don't think standing around waiting for others to do the work was very wise either! The guys did that too and the guy carrying the chairs was a guest too! Things have to flow efficiently and sometimes one's impression may have to be compromised in the process!
I also help to carry hymnals from the church to my choir room before practice. I don't think gender has anything to do with this. Though the guys usually do it, it doesn't hurt for girls to help them! It's just books we're talking about here! Such indulgence by guys would be spoiling them but of course, it's not guys' fault for being nice!
To wait for guys and expect to be served by them is tantamount to being bratish and princess-like. However, even Cinderella did chores before she became a princess! Well then, they probably belong to the Stepsisters' Club!
In a relationship, it'd give the guys pressure to cater to the girls' needs all the time. I think it'd be more ideal if the girls try to cater to the guys' needs too! Such attempt at more equality would be desirable because though guys are strong, they are still human! They need this type of love too! The love shared would thus be stronger, lasting, giving and more genuine.
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