It is true that the Western way of bringing up children is rather 'soft' and is not so concerned with values. I do not condone how children are allowed to call their parents by their first names instead of addressing them by their relation ie. Daddy or Mum. The Asian way is stricter and enforces discipline more, in comparison. It is quite sad to read how a son regards his father as a boss rather than as a loving parent, due to his harsh upbringing though.
As a tutor, I cane naughty kids only as a last resort. I have also learnt to offer praises even for little achievements and encouragement to the students who need it. It really is about sensing their needs and using the best ways to enable them to be motivated in their efforts. One common method used by some teachers and parents is reverse psychology, where the child is told that he is not good enough in the hope that he will desire to prove he is otherwise. It unfortunately does not work for everyone. Some children may think they really are not good enough and that no matter what they do, they can never be otherwise. The parent's or teacher's effort will have backfired then.
Professor Amy Chua's parenting memoir has sparked controversy. Her requirement for her daughters to practise their piano playing for 3 hours and to ace their school subjects are extreme for me. She is forcing them to do something they may not want to do in terms of the piano playing and she may be putting undue pressure on what their limited capabilities can take in terms of acing their subjects. My parents told me that they did not really put a lot of pressure on me in my studies as they could see that my forte was in other areas. Bless them!
